2

With you here I feel lost.

As though time itself is moving slowly,

Constantly hiding and betraying my kindness.

Sometimes you make me wonder if I am too trusting.

I think about you and I see it behind your eyes,

that you are not being honest,

that you are hiding away apart of yourself from me.

Names, names and places,

anonymous places and faces.

For once I feel as though the bullet is in my heart,

all jagged and broken.

Tearing out my love,
my compassion,
and my tenderness,

leaving me.

Am I just an empty shell of a loveless man?

Does it not please you,

to see me hurting,

and to do nothing

and to say nothing

Nothing

Nothing

the emptiness and quietness of the hallowed soul.

Is it okay that I love you far away,

distant,

and dissonant.

Pale blank utopia

without the disillusionment of heart aches and heartpains.

You sadden me,

with all your mystery.

Mystery so mysterious

that I weep for those who know

what is the dystopian minefield of your heart

the bleakness of a world unknown.

I share

I share

feelings,

thoughts,

the truth,

but you hide and cower,

trying to shield you from the light.

The blinding and all consuming light,

you know not that it radiates from inside you.

The light is you own

you are consuming yourself.

Bright bright and drowning out the shadows,

drowning me out .

It is a cold light,

chill and bright.

Your warmth is leaving

I am left in the cold aftermath.

A devastating

and shrill

and piercing cold

that hurts to the touch,

blinds the sight, and kills happiness.